Furthering the Kingdom

After twenty four hours of Methadone withdrawal and respiratory issues, Ayden has been wiped and has so far slept two full nights. That means Bryan and I have also slept better! (Thanks for praying!) He has also been a much happier baby. He rests well, and he plays well. His legs and arms are once again in constant movement, and his activity is not part of screaming, sweating, and thrashing; instead, he is back to dancing, marching, and playing the drums. He has been quite talkative, and we are starting to hear more than one consonant. He smiles more often and continues to be alert and attentive. Bryan was able to do side lying with him, as well as playing while sitting up. We were glad to see the return of our little boy.

The only discouraging part about yesterday was that Ayden's chest x-ray was worse. Basically, they started him back on all of the diuretics that he was originally on when he came to the floor. According to the resident that came in to look at Ayden this morning, Ayden's chest x-ray this morning looked "good." I look forward to seeing it for myself during rounds. Ayden's oxygen support continues to be weaned; he has been turned back to .075 liters of oxygen.

The nurses of 6C continue to be supportive. Ayden has had many of his (and our) favorites during this return trip, Havilah (four shifts), Margaret (two), Nicole (one), Courtney (three), Sarah (two) and today Stephanie (Go, Tigers!). We are blessed by their daily forgiveness and constant nurturing and care for our family.

I wanna help you, Ms. Stephanie.

Ms. Stephanie and I have been buddies
ever since she took care of me in the PCCU after my Norwood.

Over the past three+ weeks, I have been thinking a lot about a Bible verse that my daddy texted me. At the end of the Book of Job, Job, in a moment of repentance and self-recognition, tells the Lord, "I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted" (Job 42: 2 NIV). I have tried to be mindful of how God will use Ayden's life to further His kingdom; Ayden is a miracle, and his life is a witness of God's strength and love. I toil over Ayden's pain and fear, and I have worn his struggle (and mine) on my shoulders, as if I have control over the burden, as if I can carry it for him (for our family). I am no different from Job-- arrogant, self righteous, and sinful. Today, like many others, I pray that I can hand over Ayden; he isn't really mine anyways. I just am blessed enough to be his mom.

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Note to Havilah: I think that it is super cool that you are walking in the Heart Walk today. You very obviously love cardiac children, and you bless many with your own tender heart. Thank you for being you.